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A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”
“What?” said the puzzled groom. “How can that be? You were married to ten men before me?”
The new bride explained her situation thus:
- Well, husband #1 was a sales representative, he kept telling me how great it was going to be but never delivered.
- Husband #2 was in software services, he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.
- Husband #3 was from field services, he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.
- Husband #4 was in telemarketing, even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.
- Husband #5 was an engineer, he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
- Husband #6 was from finance and administration, he thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.
- Husband #7 was in marketing, although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
- Husband #8 was a psychologist, all he ever did was talk about it.
- Husband #9 was a gynecologist, all he did was look at it.
- Husband #10 was a stamp collector, all he ever did was… God! I miss him!
… But now that I’ve married you, I’m really excited!
“Good,” said the new husband, “but, why?”
“You’re a lawyer. This time I know I’m gonna get screwed!”
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